One Good Night in Las Vegas
by worthy-of-the-shield
Summary: The Avengers wake up after a rather wild night in Las Vegas. With little memory of the previous night they (attempt to) retrace their steps with the little clues that they have in order to track down a missing friend (oh and Vision). Also Tony and Bruce hooked up meaning it was probably them who got married... What the heck happened last night?
1. Chapter 1

Tony awoke suddenly, the pounding in his head making his hangover painfully obvious. He groaned loudly and sat up in bed. He looked down only to realise that he was stark (hah!) naked. He sighed and rubbed his face with his hands trying to remember the events of the night before, but his mind seems to have turned into a fuzzy mess of blurs of different shapes and colours.

Tony heard a sudden groan come from a lump under the covers next to him. He yelled out in shock and the person yelled too until they manage to push the covers of them and sit up in bed. He and Bruce both looked at each other for a second and then immediately grabbed the covers to cover themselves up.

"Are you naked?" Tony asked.

Bruce nodded in response and then grabbed his forehead when the pounding became too much. "What happened last night?"

"I- I remember laughing and- and..." Tony trailed off and then stared and Bruce who look per quite terrified.

"We didn't..."

"No, of course we-"

"That's ridiculous, I mean-"

"Yeah," Tony went to stand up only to slowly sit back down.

"Umm... Bruce? I get the feeling that, due to the fact that my lower back is currently refusing to let me move, we did indeed have sex last night," Bruce groaned and pulled the covers over his head.

A few seconds later there's a loud rapping on the door. Tony clutched his forehead in one hand at the noise and pulled on a pair of rumpled jeans that had been abandoned on the floor. He pulled the door open to find a very not hungover Steve Rogers standing there with a knowing smirk on his face. Next to him was a very hungover Bucky Barnes who looked like death had finally caught up with him.

"Good morning, Tony," Steve never dropped the smirk from his face.

"What d'you want Cap?" Tony muttered.

"Can I use your bathroom," Bucky interrupted, looking really pale. He barged past Tony, not waiting for an answer, and a few seconds later they heard the sounds of throwing up coming from the bathroom.

"How are you not hungover?"

"Can't get drunk, remember?" Steve answered. "I mean I got a little drunk, due to the sheer amount we all went through last night, and Thor somehow managed to sneak some of his thousand year old liquor into my drink, but I'm relatively okay now."

"So do you remember what happened last night?"

"Well... pretty much, but I kinda lost you guys around ten thirty and I couldn't find you again 'till one in the morning, so who knows what you guys got up to. By that point Bucky had passed out so I forced you guys all up to bed, but it looks like not all of you slept," Steve raised his eyebrows suggestively.

Tony groaned, "Does everyone know?"

"You serious?" Steve actually snorted. "You guys were all over each other when I found you. And if they don't know now, they will once they see those hickeys."

Tony groaned again.

"So," Steve started. "How was it?"

Tony promptly slammed the door in his face.

"Bucky, what have you done with the sweet and innocent Cap we all know and mostly love," Tony called before collapsing on the bed. Bucky strolled out of the bathroom looking much better now he'd gotten all the alcohol out of his system.

"What time do you reckon you guys'll be up?"

"I could get up in about ten minutes. Bruce?" Tony only got a groan in reply. "I'll get him up," Tony told Bucky, who nodded and left.

"C'mon big guy, let's go," Tony grabbed Bruce's arm and started dragging him out of bed. "Don't make me do something to summon the other big guy."

Bruce sighed and pushed himself up, dragging the covers with him in order to cover himself up.

"Hey," Bruce asked, standing in the bathroom doorway. "Was it good, last night I mean?"

"Can't really remember to tell you the truth. Though I'm sure it was fine."

"It's just that… I haven't, you know, done it in a while so…" Bruce admitted looking rather sheepish.

"Oh, well yeah. I seemed to be having a good time from what I remember. You were great."

Bruce nodded for a second before saying, "This is weird now isn't it?"

"A little."

"So, can I get you guys anything to drink?"

All eight avengers turned to glare at the young waiter, who shuffled nervously, obviously only now just realising the state they were all in.

"So, eight glasses of water then," he smiled a little, before turning to go.

"Make sure they all have ice," Tony quickly added as he left. "So does anyone remember anything about last night?"

"I regret to inform you all that I appear to have misplaced Mjolnir," Thor admitted.

"You lost a giant hammer that only you can pick up, somewhere in Las Vegas?!" Bucky said, incredulously. "Why did you even have it?"

"I bring Mjolnir everywhere with me, in case we are in great peril and require his assistance!"

"Did you just refer to your hammer as a 'he'?" Clint asked. "And anyway can't you just stretch out your hand and it'll come whizzing to you?"

"Don't try that!" Steve stopped him quickly. "I doubt the citizens of Last Vegas will be thrilled when a hammer suddenly smashes through a load of the buildings here on its way back to you."

"Hey guys," they all turned to see Wanda sliding into a seat next to Natasha, wearing a pair of sunglasses that still had the price tag on them. "Do you know where Vision is?"

They all looked at each other as dawning realization hit all their faces.

"Holy crap, I lost my son."

"Wait, why is he your son?" Bruce accused. "I created him just as much as you did!"

"Don't worry, now you are married you'll both get custody of your fully grown 'son'," Wanda smirked at them both.

Silence once again fell over the table.

"Wait, me and Bruce… got married last night!" Tony's jaw visibly dropped.

Wanda shrugged. "I remember being in a chapel, so someone must have. And you were both so… so," she pauses trying to think of a word.

"Obvious?"

"Clingy?"

"All fresco?"

"Nice one," Steve commented on Bucky's suggestion.

"Thanks, babe."

"Don't call me babe."

"Sorry."

"Anyway!" Tony raised his voice.

"We were definitely in a chapel," Bruce muttered. "But we were so drunk. I mean it can't be legal, they can't let us actually get married…"

"Maybe we should focus our efforts on finding Vision. I mean can he can get drunk?" Steve suggested.

"I honestly don't know," Tony admitted looking to Bruce.

"I suppose he should be able to, but he's so extraordinary it wouldn't surprise me if he was immune to its effects."

"Was he with us, when you found us last night?" Bucky asked Steve.

"Umm, well now you mention it, I don't think he was."

"So to sum up, we lost Vision, Tony and Bruce may or may not be married and we left a giant ass hammer laying around," Clint groaned. "Well shit…"


	2. Chapter 2

The avengers all left the hotel feeling both worried and determined to use their combined knowledge and memory in order to track down their friend.

"Do not fear Mjolnir, we are coming to save you!" Thor suddenly yelled out.

"He is way too attached to that thing," Bucky muttered to Steve, who smirked.

"We were thinking that we'd track down Vision first, Thor," Bruce reminded him gently. "Anyway, Steve? Where were we when you found us?"

"Err... It was just here and you were coming from... that direction," he pointed to the left. Everyone seemed pretty happy to move before- "Or that direction," he pointed to the right.

"You don't remember!?" Bucky exclaimed.

"Hey that thousand year old liquor is strong stuff!" Steve defended. "Tony, can't you track Vision somehow?"

"To do that I'd have to contact Friday, and I'd need my suit to do that."

"Well then go do that," Clint pushed.

"Well, the problem is I don't actually have my suit," Tony explained.

"Wait, Thor brought his giant hammer that only he can pick up as a precaution, but you didn't bring even one of your suits!" Natasha yelled incredulously. "You brought four massive suitcases!"

"Hey I have a very vigorous night time moisturizing routine!"

"Tony, I brought my shield, Clint brought his bow and a ton of arrows and Nat brought about a dozen guns that she somehow managed to get through security. Thor even brought Mjolnir! What were you planning to do if we were attacked?" Steve exclaimed.

"Well to be honest with you Cap, I don't expect to be attacked while on holiday," Tony smirked.

"This is no time for you to be throwing your snark around, Tony," Steve accused going full Captain America.

"Hello?! You are aware that we're not actually being attacked," Wanda pointed out.

"She's right guys, we all need to calm down," Bruce said, ever the expert on when people need to stay calm. "We all need to focus and try to remember where we all were last night so we can find Vision, find Mjolnir and figure out whether me and Tony are married. Okay?"

There was a murmur of general agreement around the group.

"Alright then let's move!"

"I think this is the right place," Wanda decided as the group stood outside of The Little White Wedding Chapel.

"If you say so," Tony said, before pushing open the doors and entering. The group approached a woman sitting at a desk.

"Welcome to the Little White Wedding Chapel, how may I be of service?" She said in a voice rich with sugary sweetness.

"Umm, hi! We think we might've come in here yesterday?" Tony replied.

"Oh yes! You're the two cuties who got married last night!" she squealed.

"Yes that's right, we were just wondering though, are these marriages actually legal and, you know, official," Bruce asked.

"Yep. 100%!" A groan spread across the group.

"Excuse me," Steve pushed his way to the desk, "but do you understand how drunk they were last night, how could you let them get married in that state?"

The woman raised an eyebrow, her sugary demeanor melting away. "Well I don't remember you being there last night to stop them, Captain."

"Holy crap, she knows," Clint muttered.

"Look we'd all appreciate if you didn't tell anyone we were here, but is it possible for us to not be married right now," Bruce asked carefully.

"Sorry, but you're gonna have to get divorced or get an annulment, though I doubt you'll qualify for one."

"Oh God!" Tony ran his hands through his hair frustrated.

"Don't worry about it. For now let's just focus on finding our friend," Bruce said placing a hand on Tony's shoulder.

"Yes! To Mjolnir!" Thor boomed.

"Vision! He was talking about Vision!" Clint all but yelled at Thor.

"No yelling in the chapel," the woman told them firmly. Every one of the avengers turned to glare at her. "Oh and you guys are very lucky that I haven't tweeted about this. I bet you wouldn't want the press to know that the avengers are gallivanting drunk around Las Vegas!"

"Ok, then. What do you want?" Natasha asked her face set.

"The usual. Photos, autographs and a coffee date with one of the guys," she smirked. The guys all looked between them.

"Rock, paper, scissors anyone?"

Ten minutes later they all left the chapel, leaving the woman with signed photos and Clint's phone number.

"Please never tell Laura about this!" he pleaded.

"Of course not! Wouldn't dream of it!" Natasha laughed.

"Anyway, back to the task at hand. I reckon this was the last place you guys went before coming back to the hotel. So you two," Steve turned to Tony and Bruce, "need to try and remember where you were when you decided to get married."

Tony closed his eyes for a second and thought back to the night before. "I think we were in a club, because I remember shouting over the music. And dancing. Really, really bad dancing."

"Wanda?" Bruce asked suddenly.

"Yes?"

"Couldn't you, you know, look into our minds and see where we were last night?"

A 'huh' chorused round the group when they realised the possibility of this idea.

"I'm not sure. I've never tried to read events that the person couldn't remember," Wanda shrugged. "But I will give it a go. Who wants to volunteer?"

Silence covered the group. You could actually hear the non-existent wind whipping in the background like in movies, used just to emphasize that no one was making a sound.

"Rock, paper, scissors?"


End file.
